Why Having a Lodged Kidney Stone is Like Being Very Pregnant

  • someecaards kidney stone redactedYou are so tired of carrying this thing around—the bloating, the pain, the nausea, the endless doctors’ appointments. You just want it out of you already!
  • It kicks at odd times with a ferocity that doubles you over and makes you wonder if everything is okay.
  • You can’t bend over very far because your stowaway will object.
  • You have to pee all the time, including at night.
  • Everyone is tired of hearing about it and how miserable you are.
  • You can’t go on any trips because the darn thing might suddenly decide today’s the day!
  • You’re sometimes (with increasing frequency) grumpy and unreasonable.
  • You don’t feel well enough to be very productive, but you’ve still gotta get stuff done, anyway.
  • Friends and family keep calling you up to ask, “Just how much longer are you going to wait?”
  • You’re pretty sure that if it doesn’t come out soon, the doctor is going to want to go in after it.
  • Your friends keep telling you horror stories you really don’t want to hear about what can go wrong.
  • People keep giving you well-intentioned, but entirely unhelpful, advice.  “Drink a bunch of olive oil and it’ll slip right out!”
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